i realized that most singaporean guys like shu nus.. definition of shu nus? fair, long hair, big eyes, mini-skirt/spag strap wearing skinny demure girls who are prone to DIDs(damsels in distress). think jolin tsai, cyndi wang, angela zhang.. i've got guy friends like that.. it used to upset me, but it took me less than a week to get over it.

while these shu nus had guys nursing crushes on them, i was the one hanging out with the guys. while the shu nus held the guys' eyes when they walked through the canteen, i was the one holding that conversation with them. kinda reminds me of three friends i had who had shu nus as gfs. and this post is actually dedicated to these guys who just made that relationship so worthwhile for whatever time it lasted for until we lost contact. =)

**
JW>
you fed me when i was hungry, literally. you gave me bread and noodles and hand-fed me that bite of your hotdog, despite the incessant jesting from your friends. what can i say? you were so incredibly sweet although it was the first day we got to know each other. you tolerated my teasing and teased me back to the point where i felt my face flush out of awkwardness. but then you charmed me back into our friendship with your show of concern, as if the teasing never happened.

you still smile at me when we see each other around. the way you attempted to get my attention was childish and never failed to make me smile inspite of myself. you were my ducky pal and my first ever earring boy. you knew i cried that day but didn't make a ho-ha out of it. instead, you reassured me, not knowing that you were one of the reasons why i cried.

ZC>
we would go home together. the bus ride home was always fun as we "exchanged" beauty tips. i liked it when you smiled at me 'cos girls were always clamouring for your attention. and you still spoke to me after i spooked you with one very regretful remark (though i don't know if you remember it anymore).

do you know that you were one of the reasons why i wanted back into that community i nearly lost? knowing that i might never have that chance to see you smile at me and to have you smile back made me cry. but you didn't know that. when you first thought that you were going to lose that community as well, you wanted to jump off taka. we spoke on the phone on my way to town. i told you not to be silly and to wait for me to watch u jump. you waited. then we laughed about it.

KY>
I enjoyed teasing you and you obviously knew it. i like how your cheeks flush each time i teased you, how they flush when you laugh.. and how you just have that nature pretty boy flush. you tried to "steal" hunky tutor from me with ur other friends but hunky chose us instead.

i miss how your name on my phone just wakes me up during boring lectures 'cos i picture your impish lopsided dimpled grin. the same one you gave me when you and jf daringly teased me, saying that you "gay boys" could handle me as well. the same one you had when jf tried to redeem himself.. and that grin you had when we spoke abt flying. then we lost touch. but you proved sincere when you remembered how to spell my name after we didn't see each other or converse. your assurance at my lowest pt back then gave me that window to dare dream.
**

i mean to keep their identities a secret. but i left enough clues that if they read this post, they would know who they are. so what's the point of this post? i guess.. it's just to record down guys whom i wasn't very close to and yet made an impact in my life during my "anti-love" stage. who says platonic r/s don't work? i'm living proof that they do. with memories like these, i'm grateful for being one of the guys and not a shu nu.