work's been a whole rollarcoaster ride of emotions. of depression and joy.. this was from yday..

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not having a good day. rather frustrated with just about everything that i don't understand. the mundane matters that shouldn't matter are suddenly blown up. oh bleepity crap. feel like crying right now. really badly.
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i love Him.

i love how He shows me that He cares.. i love how He reminds me that He's watching over me.. that while He doesn't have to work His magic to tell me that He's never left me, He still does. that giddy sensation of love abounding. if He can do the greater thing to send His own Son to die for me when i was His enemy...

what more to take the steering wheel from this sinful girl He calls His child and deliver her from the king of ulu in Johor back to the ulu of ulu-s in tuas.

when i never prayed for the burden to be lifted..
when i never prayed for the chance to not go..
when i never prayed for a change of plans..

when all i prayed was for me to continue to remember and glorify Him in all that i do and say.. in my work.. in my responsibilities.. in my life.

but He knew all the unspoken fears and anxiety in my heart when i tried to suppress them to face this chapter of my life.. of being far from the like-minded people whom i've grown to love and call family.

lesson learnt? i need to stop trying to be strong. i need to remember that i am weak.. that i am defenceless.. that i am vulnerable.. but He's my fortress and strength and all that i can depend on.

oh my God. i love Him.
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then last night was after glow too. so we had it at lydia's. it was fun to sit around with the usual bunch and chat.. thiang's finally back too. got to catch up with ppl like xy, ben, josh, dan.. then it was supper. the amazing 9 of us squashed into nat's car. back seat was kenji, ben and winston. the middle saw kelly, bj, jt and me. then marcus drove.

really quite an odyssey.

but i love the laughter.. the randomness of our chit chat.. can't wait for the next time i get to catch up with them again!